Posts Tagged ‘Country Music’

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The Drunkest Woman in Terrible’s* 

she mumbles something about barbecues / as the yachts on the big-screen harbor-cruise

and some ditto-head clown two bar-stools down / pontificates his snail-darter views

she’s the drunkest woman in Terribles / but her cut-offs make that burden bearable

drunk she is stinkin’ but she’s got me thinkin’ / my broken heart is repairable

by the drunkest woman in Terrible’s

the slots yowl like 94 monkeys / her legs are neither too thin nor chunky

gravity calls, from her bar-stool she falls / but she’s not just another Coors junkie

she’s the drunkest woman in Terrible’s / but her long legs make that burden bearable

she says she’s from Lincoln but she’s got me thinkin’ / my broken heart is repairable

by the drunkest woman in Terrible’s

we’re two lost fortune wheel spinners / time to get a decent meal in ‘er

prime rib and wine, $9.99 / God we’re a pair of real winners

she’s my new love right here in Terrible’s / gonna buy her a ring she finds wearable

we’ll get married by an Elvis named Larry / get a cottage that’s cozily share-able

me and the drunkest woman in Terrible’s

she’s the drunkest woman in Terrible’s

*Las Vegas casino at Paradise and Flamingo

copyright – G.A. Miller

Wildfire, My Pet Snail

(chorus) he’s Wildfire, my pet snail / he ain’t as fast as light rail

I gotta smile when he wags that tail / he’s Wildfire, my pet snail

I found him outside under a plant / surrounded by some hungry ants

felt sorry for him and picked him up / then he wagged that tail like a friendly pup

(repeat chorus)

he ain’t much work as pets go / he don’t cost me any dough

I can fly to Paris, check out the Louvre / then fly back home, he’s barely moved

(repeat chorus)

he lives in my old aquarium / someday he’ll die and I will bury ‘um

down by the river in a thunder shower / and once a year I’ll bring him flowers

(repeat chorus)

copyright – G.A. Miller

photo by Lizzie Miller

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